Friday, September 20, 2013

A Fat People Trying to be in Modelling/Become a Model ... ?' ❤

Hey guys ... 

Just so you know, the official photographs for the pink&proper bikini fashion show is out on their FaceBook's page ! I'm not really pleased with that though because of fats-catching-angle (simply my own opinion and you can check it out if you want) ?' I know that i'm fat but a photographer should try their best to capture the most perfect one right ?' (unless he loves fats) Anyways, the picca above is from Josh Lim (i bet everyone know him so ...), thanks and i love it (it is blur due to edited) ! I'm still en route collecting the show's picca(s) so stay tuned yea ... 

Clearly this is my first time ever in modelling ?' (Can i use this word ?' Hmm ...) i was so damn nervous whenever i think of it (before the show), i have tons of butterflies in my stomach like literally they are flying around inside my stomach and of course reducing my foods intake drastically so that i can have at least a not-so-bloated-tummy for the show. For your secret information, this is my very first time in putting on a bikini and already need to showcase them in front of peoples ! I'm actually a person who have stage-fright and i can't smile charmingly and naturally in front of peoples so when i was on the runway, my lips are making effort to be lifted up and my face muscle is actually trembling ... BUT look into the camera instead of peoples' faces ! (here is my discovery, lol) 

I know that i'm one of the person who showcasing bikini collections on the runway but that doesn't mean i'm a model already; just like i blogged but it doesn't really make me a blogger (i'm still not a blogger YET) so basically before the show i was so damn not-nice (attitude because of anxiety ?') because i'm self-conscious enough that i know myself will not reach peoples' expectation of a bikini model (simply because of muffin tops ?' huge thigh ?') but before that day i've promised myself that no matter what kind of bikini i'm on, no matter how much fats are "overwhelming" from the bikini(s), i have to rock the runway like nobody cares ! Confident always the best makeup ever (this is a quote i always preached)

After the show i still worry about comments and also picca(s) of me rocking the runway like "What will be my picca(s) look like ?' Fei PO ?'" I didn't receive any comments right after the show from audience(s) because no one walk up to us and congratulating/thanking us for rocking the runway so i bet we wasn't that "rock" enough ?' SO i was thinking like "Okay ! Fine ! Don't care ..." and still chill around like a boss but secretly still wanted to hear some feedback(s) from someone ?' or maybe anyone ?' "Hey ... You look great on blah blah blah set of bikini but fat in blah blah blah set of bikini !" just saying, lol BUT the next day, i received a message from person-in-charge saying that i'm kinda did a good job on the show "U natural model weh hahahah u should try modelling more :p" (i copied every single words from the message she sent me, i swear) Should i trust her ?' (i think no because of the hahahah, maybe she is just trying to be nice to me ?') She is working on the video of the show so once it is out i will check it out first and will show you guys if it is "passed or above" for me :P And when i'm being tagged by those picca(s), my friend nice enough to comments like "wow ... you look gorgeous" and really thanks for that, appreciated ! 

Til now, i didn't really received any bad comments from anyone except my sister which is the one i concerned the most >...< She said like "you look buff in the picca(s)", "LOL, you think you very thin ?'", "Naked picca(s)" and sort of comments ! Okay ... I have to admitted that i'm not thin at all ! Yea ... I born with a two out of 6 packs on my stomach and grow fats especially bottom part ! Naked picca(s) ?' Yea they are conservative because they concerned about me so i take it without a huff ! But there is one comment that really pissed me off which is "Man Man Deng Lah Ni ..." after i told her that i will work hard on trying to be a model ?!' She didn't put this sentence in a teasing mode or even joking mode ! She is making a statement/affirmation ! (i knew it because she is my sister ?') WHAT'S THE FUCK WRONG OF HAVING A (BIG) DREAM ?' I know there is someone out there making this kind of statement in their mind without speaking it out to me (because you simply have no guts ?') but it is okay ... Whatever the shit you say/comment, i know who and what i am without having you to say it ! Thanks for dropping by, ciao ~ 

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